Journey to Belonging

I used to walk into church feeling completely out of place. These people seemed nice, but I honestly felt like we had nothing in common. They looked like “goodie two-shoes,” and I was convinced they were judging me—even though they didn’t know anything about me. I didn’t look like them, dress like them, or act like them. And honestly… Was it even okay to wear my Seahawks gear on a Sunday morning? Part of me would have rather been watching the game, yet something in me liked being there. The music was beautiful. The pastor’s words hit my heart.

That was my mindset the first time I ever walked into a church. Actually—let’s be real—I felt like that for a long time, until I finally started to get to know the people. For months, I would slip into service and slip out as fast as possible. No eye contact, no conversations. People would try to interact with me, but I’d smile politely, nod, and keep moving. Inside, I felt like I wasn’t one of them. Every week I faced the same choice: Do I stay home, sleep in, enjoy a lazy morning, or watch the game? Or do I get up and go to church? Deep down I knew where I was supposed to be. But my flesh always pushed for the easier route.

Eventually, I told myself, If I'm going to keep showing up, I might as well talk to someone. Just a small conversation—very surface-level. That wouldn’t hurt anything. Those little meet-and-greets were pivotal for me. They helped me stay a little longer instead of sprinting to the car. And since my daughter was starting to make friends, I figured… if she could do it, I could too.  We kept going to church, and my soul felt good with that choice. If we missed a Sunday, something in me felt off. Doing what we know is right truly is the best way to go.

Turning Point: The Bible Study

Then something life-changing happened: the church advertised a women’s Bible study on the book of Acts.

Since I clung to every word the pastor preached, my heart wanted to go deeper. I had accepted Jesus into my heart, but understanding the Bible on my own was hard. Hearing it taught made it come alive for me. So I showed up.

The teaching of Acts blew my mind—especially the story of Stephen, a man martyred for his faith. .

“While they were stoning him, Stephen prayed, ‘Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.’ Then he fell on his knees and cried out, ‘Lord, do not hold this sin against them.’ When he had said this, he fell asleep.”
—Acts 7:59–60

This shook me. Stephen asked God not to hold the sin of his killers against them… while he was dying. What kind of love is that? What kind of strength? What kind of faith? In that moment, Stephen mirrored Jesus Himself—who, while hanging on the cross, prayed, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” The same Spirit that lived in Jesus was living in Stephen. That realization changed everything for me.

That’s when I first saw the difference between believers who truly follow Christ and those who simply say they do. Sitting around a table with those women, I realized they wanted to know me—not just surface-level details, but my heart, my story, and where I had been. Their love was undeniable—not perfect, but real. They were genuine, not fake. Of course, I was still skeptical at first, but something about them felt different.

I had never experienced love like that from people before, though I had experienced it from Jesus. And it felt like He was inviting me into community—to walk with brothers and sisters in Christ, God’s adopted children. Over time, those women and I became bonded, locked in by our shared belief in Jesus. That common faith tied us together in a way I had never known, and it changed everything for me.

It was time to let these people into my life. 

Finding Family

So I started getting to know people at church. Week after week, I kept showing up—to service and Bible study—and I watched my life slowly transform. I joined a small group where we talked about Jesus, shared meals, and watched our kids become friends. Before I knew it, their home felt like our home.

During one of the hardest seasons of my life—my divorce—those people didn’t disappear. They showed up. They listened, prayed, and comforted me when I felt completely undone. The people I once felt intimidated by became the very ones who had my back. When I needed help the most—the day my girls and I left our family home—it was my small group, along with others from church and a few family members, who moved us into a new place in just two hours. The love and support blew my mind. I felt completely taken care of—by my Heavenly Father and by His people.

God-Sent People

Another thing I’ve learned on this journey is that God sends special people to come alongside you—people who will walk with you, teach you, pray for you, and help you grow. What’s funny is… the very people God sends to me are usually the ones who intimidate me the most at first. I shy away from them, convinced I’m not good enough to be their friend or that I don’t belong.

But that’s exactly how the enemy works. Scripture tells us:

“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”
—John 10:10

The enemy gets in your head and whispers lies—anything to keep you from stepping into something good, something healthy, something God-ordained. Yet every single time, those intimidating people turn out to be the ones who help me grow the most. They challenge me, support me, and point me back to Jesus. God sent them to me—and along the way, I even met someone who I now confidently call one of my best friends. (You know who you are.) Because of these people, my faith has grown tremendously. They are more than friends—they are family.

I love my people. I’m so grateful God knew exactly who needed to come around me in order to help me mature in my faith. 

For Anyone Afraid to Walk Into Church

I’m writing this to encourage anyone who feels skeptical, nervous, or unsure about going to church.

It’s okay to feel out of place.
It’s okay to feel guarded.
It’s okay to not have it all figured out.

Go anyway.

Go because you know it’s the right thing.
Go because your soul needs it.
Go because God designed you to grow with other believers.

Church is a place for broken people who need Jesus—not perfect people who have it all together. And if someone does act perfect? Well, God is still working on them too. Pray for them, and remember: none of us are perfect.

Let your guard down. Give it time. Let people in.
The community God has for you might just surprise you—just like it did for me.

Prayer- 

Dear Jesus,
Your love for me and for humanity is beyond anything I could have ever imagined. Your design for us is on purpose and for a purpose. I am beyond grateful for my community of believers, and I pray with all my heart that those who hesitate regarding Your design for us would see Your Word as truth and apply it to their lives.

God, You are so, so good. Thank You for pursuing us and leading us into Your goodness.

Amen.

Questions to ponder- 

When have you felt out of place, and what helped you feel more comfortable?

Who has God sent into your life that helped you grow in your faith?

What is one step you can take to connect more deeply with your church community?